To Suffer With

One of the things I learned while I was on the field is how to suffer.

I know, I know, that’s so dramatic. But it’s true. There are so many different kinds of trials that it’s hard to talk about them in generalities, so right now I’m going to focus on compassion, otherwise known as suffering with others.

When I was in Mexico, I learned something about three different friends in the youth group there: one who was 15 and pregnant, one struggling with homosexual feelings, and one who was abusing drugs. I was totally overwhelmed by each of these situations, knowing full well that I had never dealt with any of those specific things, and I had no idea how to help. These were obviously not the only overwhelming or painful situations I encountered in my ministry, but these were the ones that hurt me most. I remember one night in particular, going into the bathroom in our apartment and just sobbing as silently as I could. I didn’t even know what to pray to God, much less what to say to them. I felt helpless as a missionary, and even more importantly, as a friend.

But the story isn't over. A favorite verse of mine is Psalm 56:8 – “Record my lament; list my tears on your scroll – are they not in your record?” I love the thought that God knows our every tear. One of the shortest verses in the Bible, “Jesus wept,” demonstrates one of Jesus’ defining attributes: his compassion on humanity, manifested by his coming to our world and suffering with us to show us that he cares and to save us from the worst of fates. Paul says to the Colossians that he rejoices in his sufferings for them, that he is “filling up what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions for the sake of his body, the church”.

These words convince me that there is something inherently and yet intangibly valuable in our sufferings here on earth. I wish I could calculate it right away, but I guess that’s where trust comes in; it’s not an exact equation. In these situations with my friends that I described, I cried for them and let my tears be a prayer for healing and redemption. My suffering isn’t like Jesus’ in the sense that his washed away our sins, but my suffering can, like Paul’s, make a difference in my own soul as well as others, by the grace of God. Sometimes there are happy endings, and other times we just have to wait and watch, remembering that God really does care. I’ll end with this poem I wrote after that night of crying in the bathroom:

c

o

u

n

t

my

tears;

save them

in a cup, just

like you promised.

If you can walk on water,

you can build my tears into

something beautiful. I trust

you, more than ever tonight.

This pain must be used for

something valuable,

healing, like yours.

Please.

-Brettin White

Another Night At A Temporary Inn

C.S. Lewis in his book "The Problem of Pain" talks about the fact that we humans will never experience true peace here on earth. The reason for this is simple. God wants us always to remember that there is something better out there for us. "This world is not our home." So, we dwell on this earth in "pleasant inns," not mistaking our temporary shelter for the permanent homes God has for us in eternity.

Suppose C.S. Lewis is right. What if God in his great love, purposefully chose to allow us to endure trials here on earth, if for no other reason than to remind us that this place is not where we want to be? What if pain on earth were a tool of evangelism? Could sorrow be an instrument of God, always reminding us that life here is not like life there?

Today, no matter the trial, no matter the sorrow, we find temporary peace. Our peace comes from the inescapable truth that good things are coming on the horizon. No matter how hard we try or want it, earth will always have some level, some amount of pain. And yet, just like the light from the empty tomb overpowering a wooden cross, God's blessing isn't far away either. One day we will be with him in comfort. One day we will have our permanent peace.

- Chris Johnson

Meet the AnimAimers

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Burden Lifting God

Numbers 11:10- Moses heard the people of every family wailing, each at the entrance to his tent. The LORD became exceedingly angry, and Moses was troubled. 11 He asked the LORD, “Why have you brought this trouble on your servant? What have I done to displease you that you put the burden of all these people on me? 12 Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth? Why do you tell me to carry them in my arms, as a nurse carries an infant, to the land you promised on oath to their forefathers? 13 Where can I get meat for all these people? They keep wailing to me, ‘Give us meat to eat!’ 14 I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me. 15 If this is how you are going to treat me, put me to death right now—if I have found favor in your eyes—and do not let me face my own ruin.” 16 The LORD said to Moses: “Bring me seventy of Israel’s elders who are known to you as leaders and officials among the people. Have them come to the Tent of Meeting, that they may stand there with you. 17 I will come down and speak with you there, and I will take of the Spirit that is on you and put the Spirit on them. They will help you carry the burden of the people so that you will not have to carry it alone.


I hate that Moses was so frustrated (but it helps me know that it’s okay to be frustrated). I hate that he was so tired from carrying those people that he was asking God to take him out (but it helps me know that it’s okay to be honest with the Lord).

I love that God heard him in his frustration (it helps me know that He hears me when I cry out in frustration). I love that God gave him a solution and let Moses know that He recognized his pain (it helps me know that He gives me solutions as well and recognizes my pain).

I was carrying some burdens. Those burdens included but were not limited to: family, guilt, resentment, confusion, pain, loneliness, sin, heartache, insomnia, and addiction. I felt a lot like Moses when he told God “the burden is too heavy for me”. Much of my burdens were the result of poor choices … they were my own fault.

But you know what? God still delivered me. He heard my cry and He reached out … and took that load off my shoulders.

Had anyone asked me how any one of those burdens should have been handled I would have had my ideas for solutions. I don’t know that I would have chosen God’s solutions if He had asked. But He didn’t really ask … He just answered. Answers came through: divorce, confession, forgiveness, Bible study, prayer, surgery, moving, quitting a job, starting a new job, faith … and learning to trust a group of folks that would eventually help me carry the burdens that were still too heavy for me to bear.

- Paige Foreman

Just a few things I loved about AIMSTOCK

So… our first AIMstock just ended. (Why the red underline, MS Word? This will be in your dictionary soon enough…)

And to be honest, I hate camping. I hate sweat and bugs and outdoors when they are all at the same time. But for good people… I will do it. And so this was a weekend I would do it for. I had no clue how appreciative I would be by the end of it.

So here are some of the reasons why I loved this weekend, and what I loved about it:

*When Jason called me to tell me that the place hadn’t been cleaned as expected and they had to bug bomb it on arrival, I knew immediately that this was a group of friends who could handle it and wouldn’t freak out. They’d already been taught to be flexible. And besides… most of us lived in less than Hilton conditions on the field.

* Arriving late to a campfire and familiar faces I don’t get to see nearly enough. Waves and smiles from people I dearly love… realizing we’re about to pick up where we last left off… no matter how long ago it was.

*Sitting under the stars and talking about how big God is… And seeing it at the same time.

* Our kids… playing together like no time has passed.

*Hannah falling asleep in my arms.

*Singing around the campfire. Singing. Singing. Singing.

* Singing Alabare, and No Hay Dios, and Solamente in Cristo. Then someone asking if we could sing something in Russian or Thai. Nope… can’t.

* Smores. Glowsticks. More Stars.

* Walking up to the cabin in the dark and overhearing the kids have this conversation with each other.

“Won’t it be so cool when we grow up and we’re all missionaries together?”

* And hearing the rest of that conversation:

Her: “When I grow up, I’m going to go to AIM, and then do whatever God wants me to do.”

Him: “Yeah. Or you could be a wrestler.”

* Seeing the little girls set up their bunks. Together. And Tonya gets mom of the year for sleeping on the top so the girls could be together.

* Walking out the cabin door to see all the tents neatly lined up. Knowing those tents are filled with more people I love. Every single one.

*Early morning mist.

* “A cow woke me up.”

*”There were wild animals. And I think I heard three gunshots.”

*Seriously yummy sausage gravy.

* Walking in and seeing friends reading their Bible, getting up early to go pray, alone or together. And no one’s making them.

*Remembering why I have such deep love for these people. Even the ones I don’t know well…yet.

* Discussing how AIM, for many of us, was our spiritual parent…the first real experience of discipleship, by which we judged all other experiences, good and bad. Appreciating more that simple but profound reality, and it’s place in my walk with Christ.

* Seeing Kris and Barb walk in. Then learning they’d taken a motorcycle 8+ hours to see us over lunch, and then head back another 8 hours.

* Knowing in this crowd… even if a job isn’t delegated…everyone pitches in till whatever is done. Serving is ingrained. It’s fruit of a life lived loving Christ.

* Listening to mountains and valleys...

* Talking. About stuff that matters.

* Watching friends relax. Watching my friends hang out with my kids. Realizing this really is more like family.

*Getting to know people I knew I’d love… and loving them.

* Watching a second generation of kids learn to “be flexible”. Little Piper and Michael could take a nap on a concrete floor with the best of them.

* Being out on a beautiful lake with my husband and kids in a rowboat.

*Hearing, (while in that rowboat…) “Mom, go right! Go right!” Now left. Left. LEFT!!!” Realizing they’re too freaked out and we have to do this more. THEN realizing the last time I said those same words, I was in a dugout canoe in the rain forest with a 12 year old Ecuadorian boy leading us to find caiman… in AIM.

* A huge slip and slide. Smiles all over kids faces.

*Seeing Cory dump his kids off in the middle of the lake.

*Tigger getting back in the lake just to help Eli and Allison get on the floating dock… jumping back through memories from years ago that I never knew would lead up to moments today that I appreciate so deeply.

*Being especially content and more relaxed than I’ve been in a long time. Coming to a mutual realization that in AIM, we learned to have very deep, intimate, friendships…. and that most of us have a hard time ever finding that quality of friendship again.

* Steak and Chicken for dinner. Cajun Shrimp boil for lunch. Seriously? Who EVER gets that while camping?!?! De.Lic.ious.

* Sunday worship… a meal together. Hearing our children ask questions about our relationship with Christ. Sitting around the tables… a family of almost 40… and yet every bit intimate.

* Breaking bread and communion within our families. Explaining… to my kids, as my friends explained to theirs. Knowing they’ll remember.

*“Time for a drawing!” It’s the FORD family. It’s the FORD family. And again… it’s the FORD family!

* Nerts. I still liked the loser table.

* “It’s the end of the world as we know it. It’s the end of the world as we know it… It’s the end…”

* Taboo.

Cory… thanks for ruining this game for me forever.

Chris… playing so well... After it’s over. “Stupid.” You were the best part of the game, friend.

Donovan and Brandon’s faces… caught in pained silent laughter and tears as Katie tried so hard : “It’s when you’re in a car accident, and you don’t wake up , and your uh, …. and you don’t remember anybody…. “ “COMA!” “Yeah! “Oh wait…. it’s’comma’.”

*Our poor kids actually putting themselves to bed…whether going to the cabin by themselves, or bringing up sleeping bags to sleep on the floor in the dining hall while we played and laughed and played.

* Realizing it felt so late… and it was only 9:30.

*Cheese crackers. Twinkies. Guacamole.

*Morning on the lake.

* Smalel groups. Question #8: “Is anything keeping you from sharing the difficult parts of your experience like Paul did?” and sitting there, choked up, wiping tears from my eyes, praying that God will help me figure out how to say ‘pride’ and ‘judgment’, and it make sense, and not make a fool of myself…and not being able to do it. Then Alisha says “Pride and judgment. Does that make any sense?” Ummm..yeah. Thanks.

* Mountain and Valley notebooks. Okay. Who didn’t rip into those like a 3 year old at Christmas? God knew us when He said to encourage one another….

I could go on and want to… but I’ll wait for next year. It’s on my calendar. :-)







- Heather Pitney Thornton

Aimstock

This Year's Aimstock was a hige success. Here is a video to see what the week was like.

One Person's Brain Child Is Another Person's Labor

We are just hours away from AIMSTOCK. While I must admit that it was fun sitting with Tim and Jason last year "dreaming up" this brain child of ours... now a year later I watch as the labor process comes to an end. A lot of hard work has gone into this year's event. Just for an idea, here's AIMSTOCK by the #'s...

41 attendees
2042 acres
15 lbs of steak
10 lbs of chicken
12 lbs of shrimp
16 kids
$1200 in donated goods
60 ft long slip n slide
10 rotating and box fans
7 bags of potatoes
5 eskimo jugs for lemonade
10 gallons of juice and milk
80 fruit filled pastries
..... ok.... I need to stop typing this so I can't start loading..... you get the point...

AIMSTOCK IS GOING TO BE A BLAST
You should join us next year (Labor Day Weekend) for AIMSTOCK 2011!
- Chris Johnson








Aimstock 2010 Schedule
Saturday
1:00 - Move in and set up camp
2:00 - Starting Matters: In the Beginning - Pavilion
Kid’s activity
3:00 - Refreshments and M/V stories
4:00 - Free time
6:00 - Dinner - Cherokee
7:00 - Size matters: Your God is bigger
Kid’s activity
8:00 - Bonfire and singing

Go to tents/cabins whenever your family needs to.


Sunday
7:00 - Lakeside devo - Meet at welcome center
8:30 - Breakfast in dining hall
9:30 - Inside Matters: Your inner world - Dining Hall
Kid’s activity
12:00 - Lunch in dining hall
1:00 - Free time
5:30 - Dinner
6:30- Communion Matters: Finding unity in the body and blood
7:30 - Refreshing Matters: Let’s Celebrate!

Go to tents/cabins whenever your family needs to.

Monday
7:00 - Lakeside devo - Meet at welcome center
8:30 - Breakfast in dining hall
9:30 - Perspective Matters: Seeing clearly is hard
Kid’s activity
12:00 - Lunch in dining hall
1:00 - Final goodbye and prayer
2:00 - Clean up